Getting it right.( no pun intended)

For someone who has never kept a diary of any sort nor been particularly fond of writing or reading (I'm an average reader).... I wonder why the heck I now keep up this blog. My writing is not a true reflection of me.. its just me trying hard to portray me and my everyday thoughts might I add to the best of my limited ability.

Looking back on some old posts of mine I suppress the urge to delete them immediately but after second thoughts I let them be... to remind me of who I think I am as opposed to who I really think I am.

All this uncertainly regarding my identity comes from the fact that I may be going though a mid life crisis of some sort. I hate labels and the fact that I should fall prey to a crisis that hardly compares with that of any real crisis...( ever heard of people in war torn areas claiming to be having a mid life crisis).. but it exists, people have been known to destroy their lives over it... so its seriousness is not be scoffed at and the descriptions of all the symptoms fits me like a glove. DRATttttttt!!!! .
Now... after reading a whack about the subject I've found out that there are millions out there who among many other issues... have no clue who they are too.
So maybe that's my justification for writing as someone else .. its certainly not because I can't find the words to express who I am ( wink wink).. its because I have no clue who I am.

Signed .. anon.

ps : its funny though.. I never had these thoughts when I was in my late teens or even before I got married or even for a good few years after being married.. I seemed to know who I was then or even if didn't... it didn't matter. Life was for living and living did not mean having an identity. Now why does it have to take a crisis to convince me of that now.